A Cynical Look On Getting Shot

A new study by the National Happiness Coalition of America has come out with new results that allege being shot in the foot may not be good for happiness.

"In a group of random study participants found on the streets of San Fransisco, 48 out of 50 subjects reported a decrease in happiness shortly after having their foot shot" reported head scientist Dr. Jhon Saadist.

A .32 Caliber Pistol was used for administration of the gunshot.

Evidently two of the subject's opinions could not actually be included among the negative results because after they begun spouting off curse words, the subjects went unconscious before they could express unhappiness. Dr. Saadist explained that a string of curse words is often an expression of great joy.

Unfortunately the NHC did not include a control group, or a group of people that were not shot in the foot during the study process, so the results are not valid.
Had the study been more complete however, the NHC estimates being shot in the foot may decrease happiness by up to 18%.
Until happiness has been proven to be affected negatively by being shot however, Physicians may still administer "shots" as a stress reduction treatment.

A Cynical Look On Posting

I would Like to inform all readers that A Cynical Look now plans to post on a weekly basis.
Most posts should be available for reading on Mondays.

A Cynical Look On Competition: Government Style! Part 2

Dan makes marbles. He's the only marble maker around, and he can make a marble out of nearly anything. His best customer is Fred.
Fred sells marbles. Fred's marbles are made of solid gold. Each marble costs him 10 dollars, but he sells them for 11 dollars.
One day, George opens up a marble shop. George sells marbles made of painted glass for 5 dollars. The marbles cost George 6 dollars each. The government declares Fred has to pay George 50% of his sales. The government also declares that refusing to sell marbles to George because he's losing money and won't be able to pay you back is illegal.
Dan still makes money, because he still profits on all of Fred's sales. He loses money every time George sells a marble, though.
Fred reacts by raising his marble price to 21 dollars, and retaining the solid gold marbles. Fewer people want to buy Fred's marbles, because they're so much more expensive. Fred reacts by lowering the quality of his marbles to silver.
Fred's silver marbles cost him 8 dollars each. He sells them for 17 dollars each. More customers come to Fred's store, but the marbles aren't as good. Fred still needs more customers. He decided to move down to marbles made of iron.
Fred's iron marbles cost him 6 dollars each. He's desperate for customers, so he sells them for 12.02. The quality is even lower now, and Fred still can barely scrape even. Fred decides he's got to move prices lower than George's.
Fred decided to buy hollow glass marbles that break if you so much as breath at them. These marbles cost Fred 50 cents each. He tries to sell than for 1.02. Nobody wants to buy such a terrible product, and Fred goes out of business.
George, who had been getting half of Fred's sales, suddenly begins to lose money. Due to his government contract, he cannot change his prices nor the type of marble he sells. George loses massive amounts of money.
Dan, who had been selling the marbles to Fred and George, cannot afford to continue to sell George marbles, as George does not pay him. Dan goes out of business.
George no longer has any marbles to sell. George goes out of business.
Now nobody sells marbles! Isn't this so much better?

If you missed the comparison, Fred is the free market. He is trying to maximize his profit at every step. George is the government, he can lose money on every sale, but make it up by sucking money away from Fred. Dan is the development, he supplies the technology and production. He loses money selling to George, but cannot stop, because George is his boss.

A Cynical Look On Competition: Government Style! Part 1

Ahh, time to pass a few more bills through congress before anyone gets a chance to read them.
Actually, this is admittedly part of the strategy being used to pass the new Health Care Bill. The new Health Care bill is "on schedule" to be voted upon during this session of congress. Liberal legislators fear that if it does not pass before Congress goes out of session, the bill may become unpopular.
Hmm, interesting
Perhaps because people will figure out what's actually in the bill?
No, I suppose that wouldn't be good for the bill's popularity.

Evidently, Obama's plan is good because it creates competition. At least, according to advocates of the bill.
"Ahh yes, competition! Now we have the free market cornered! We'll beat them at their own game and prove that capitalism doesn't work!"
Unlike corporation, the government doesn't actually have to play by the rules.
You see, Corporations actually have to make a PROFIT. To say the government is competing when it is allowed to break the only primary rule is just plain stupid.
It's like a race in the ocean between a Tuna fish and a Human, where the finish line is 2000 feet under water. The fish can go down into debt as much as it wants, but the Human is stuck with the lungs of bankruptcy.
On top of that, the Health Care bill unleashes a plethora of new taxes against insurance companies. It's as if the fish get's to break the man's legs before the race starts.
It's not really hard to see who the "winner" of this competition will be. When all is said and done though, the man may have broken legs, and the tuna might swim better, but whom do you trust more to treat your flu.