A Cynical Look On "Tiger Woods Only Joking"

Bellowing laughter erupted from the luxurious Florida home of Tiger Woods.

The famous golf professional seemed very pleased, gleefully announcing "They fell for it! They all fell for it!"Tiger's practical joke included leaking a story about an "affair" he was having, hitting a tree in his SUV, and having his wife break the windows of said SUV. It was a brilliant setup, upon further examination. The world's most boring icon, Tiger Woods, having an affair? Obviously ridiculous, but Tiger managed to prank the entire world. Pranksters everywhere, take note. This man has bested you.

"This will screw them all up, they'll be talking about it for weeks! It will be just like that time when Britney Spears was bald," he went on to say.

In an exclusive interview, Woods also explained that the real reason he wasn't attending his own tournament was so he could prank it.

Tiger takes golf in a whole new direction as he announces his plans for what he calls practical golf, "Practical jokes are much more fun than golf, so why not combine the two make golf a little more fun?"

Tiger Woods has all sorts of things planned for the competitors, "Rattlesnakes in the hole, an annoying guy that blows an air horn every time you're about to make a stroke, special tee off locations in quicksand, things like that."

I suppose we can all look forward to seeing more of those golf-ball-in-the-nuts-shots we like so much.

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Disclaimer: These events did not actually occur.

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